Barney begins the night, entering MacLaren’s wishing everyone a happy Bangtoberfest, his celebration of being single again. Sadly, this episode doesn’t feature the ‘Bangity Bang’ song at all. He treats the entire bar with Bangtoberfest swag, namely, a cannon to shoot T-shirts that read ‘This time it’s really not personal.’
Marshall then enters from somewhere and shares with Barney, Ted and Robin that Lily’s deadbeat dad showed up unannounced after he burned the house down with illegal fireworks. Robin recognizes him as a local news story she covered, though somehow she didn’t distinguish his face or the house she and the gang frequented last season.
Next, Lily comes down from the apartment to tell Marshall that his free our is up, though where was he for the first 55 minutes? She hands over Marvin and refuses to admit that she may or may not have let his dirty diaper linger for the last ten minutes so that Marshall would have to change it. The new parents also dish that they’re stressing over having to hire a nanny that weekend. When their pals suggest Grandpa Mickey, Lily tells them about the time that they spent her tenth birthday at the horse track.
Meanwhile, Robin and Ted argue over who is happier with their significant other after becoming exes again. They try to one up each other by arguing over which partner has taken over their apartments more, and Ted wins when he announces that he allows Victoria to keep her lady products at his place. The next day, Ted brags that he and Victoria have plans to attend a wedding together six months from now. Clearly he didn’t learn his lesson with Stella. Robin answers his challenge with the news that she’ll be joining Nick and his parents in Hawaii for the holidays, while Ted hasn’t even met Victoria’s parents, though he tries to pass them off as deceased.
Later, Marshall and Lily think their search for a nanny is over when they meet Mrs. Buckminster, but unfortunately, they can’t afford her. They relate their ongoing interview nightmare with the rest of the gang at the bar, which includes a woman whose most relevant experience was watching cats in rehab and a goth girl that enjoys being on the receiving end of spanks, until they meet Julie Jorgensen. Julie is not only from Marshall’s hometown, St. Cloud, MN, but he also knows her father and brother, who co-own ‘George and Morgan Jorgensen’s Organs’ in St. Cloud, as well as an Oregon location called ‘Piano Town.’ Again, Jason Segel is the funniest part of the show. They decide to hire Julie on the spot and she assures them that she’ll take the job, but already has plans to meet one more family.
Meanwhile, Barney whines that he’s at the end of his long list of tricks to get women to sleep with him and needs to come up with something new for Bangtoberfest. We see him pose as a cop and judge, using the same pick up line about ‘[getting the woman] off.’ We find out later that Julie has to pass on Lily and Marshall’s offer because she’s going on a fancy vacation with a rich single father she met at the other interview. Marshall and Lily arrive at Barney’s to find her there, and Lily uses pig latin to avoid swearing in front of Marvin. Honestly, these writers should take a peek at Ben & Kate because it wasn’t funny at all.
Lily explains that Barney is a dirty, rotten scoundrel, but Julie still refuses to work for anyone who would associate with him. When she leaves, Barney tells them they need to scram because he has another interview scheduled, and we see Barney parade a line of nannies through the apartment. Because his wife died from too much pleasure and ‘baby Edgar’ is asleep, he has them practice bathing him, and tearfully tells each one that he can’t hire them because of his attraction to them, which never fails to get them in bed. Lily is outraged, but has trouble pulling Marshall away from Edgar’s set of Hot Wheels.
At MacLaren’s, Ted calls Robin on her BS after she sucks Nick’s face off in front of him. He also points out how feminine Nick gets over a football game and Robin reminds Ted how Victoria has turned his apartment into a pig sty. The discussion continues later that week, when Robin is turned off that Nick doesn’t like when she squashes bugs and Ted complains that his place is full of them, thanks to Victoria. By the end of the episode, they end up justifying their incompatibility, but Bob Saget announces that both couples will soon break up. During one of their chats, Barney enters, looking a mess. He tells the tale of how the nannies banded together to corner him, after which he woke up under a pile of smelly diapers. None of this keeps him from chasing down the next girl he sees at the bar.
The next day, Lily prepares to call in sick for work when Mrs. Buckminster shows up and explains that Barney hired her and agreed to pay her salary. Marshall, still angry about losing Julie, is easily swayed when their new granny nanny shows him his new toy race track. It seems as though all their problems are solved, until Lily can’t seem to hand Marvin over to Mrs. Buckminster. Marshall comes home that afternoon to find Lily asleep, cuddling a stuffed monkey. When they discover that Marvin is nowhere to be found they scream in unison, Home Alone style, until Mickey walks in with the baby.
Mickey recants how he came in from his morning jog, sub sandwich in hand, which he swapped for Marvin when he found Lily snoozing. When Lily asks about the orangutan, he reveals that he swapped it for the sandwich when his stomach started growling. He also explains that Marvin is clean and fed, which he knows how to do because he was an awesome dad when Lily was a baby. He pulls out the photo album that he rescued from the house, along with a bowl of tater salad, and shows Lily photos of them together, up until her first day of preschool, when he went to the horse track because he had nothing else to do all day. Lily melts and immediately signs him on as Marvin’s grand-nanny.
Before the final funny rolls, we’re shown a photo montage of Mickey and Marvin, including more grown up photos featuring his adorable curly head of hair and Mickey giving him a crooked thumbs up (he had to have them surgically reattached after a run in with his gambling debtors) on his first day of preschool. We then cut to Barney using the classic cop charade on a woman when Mrs. Buckminster interrupts and shoos her away. Apparently she’s still on the payroll as Barney’s nanny, and the two share a moment before we see them in bed together. Typical Barney.
What did you think of this week’s episode?